Workshop Presentation
Slide 1: are you ready?
Slide 2: ready to talk?
Slide 3: Blank
Slide 4: Icebreakers
•Raising a teenager is like…
•Having a discussion about waiting to have sex with my child will probably be…
•One word that comes to mind when I think about talking to my child about sex is...
•My hope for my child in 10 years is that…
•One word that describes how I’m feeling right now is…
•I would describe my discussion with my own parents
about sex as…
Slide 5: Workshop Goals
This workshop will…
•Introduce the Parents Speak Up National Campaign.
•Show the positive influence you can have on your child by talking to them about waiting to have sex.
•Help you feel more comfortable talking to your kids about sex and give you some practical tips.
•Allow you to learn from each other.
Slide 6: Ground Rules
•All opinions are welcome and respected.
•There are no judgments.
•Everyone gets an equal opportunity to share.
Slide 7: Overview
The Parents Speak Up National Campaign is…
•A public education campaign sponsored by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.
•Designed to give parents of teens and pre-teens the information and skills they need to help their children wait to have sex.
•Supported by public service advertising in TV, radio, print, outdoor and the Internet as well as an education program for parents in their communities.
•Available online at www.4parents.gov
Slide 8: Video Segment 1
let’s start talking
Slide 9: Did You Know?
Teen sex is more prevalent than you think
•1 out of 3 ninth graders has had intercourse at least once.
•The U.S. has the highest teen pregnancy rate in the industrialized world.
•1 out of 7 high school students reports having had sex with 4 or more partners.
Slide 10: Did You Know?
Teen sex has physical and emotional consequences
•1 in 4 teenage girls nationwide has an STD.
•Almost half of all girls who have sex before age 15
get pregnant.
•Research shows that teen sex can deflate self-esteem, erode optimism and spoil the quality of intimate relationships.
•66% of teens who have had sex wish they had waited longer.
•Teens and young adults have the highest STD infection rate in the U.S., with 50% of all newly diagnosed STDs.
Slide 11: Did You Know?
Kids want to hear from their parents
•Teens rank parents as the #1 influence on their sexual decisions.
•88 percent of teens say it would be easier to postpone sexual activity if they were able to have more open, honest conversations with their parents.
•6 out of 10 teens say their parents are their role models for healthy, responsible relationships.
Slide 12: Top 10 Reasons
Top 10 Reasons Parents Give For NOT Talking To Their Kids
10. If I talk to my teen about waiting to have sex, she’ll probably go out and have it … that day. Possibly within the hour.
9. I wouldn’t want to prevent my spouse from having that conversation!
8. The Internet knows more than I do.
Slide 13: Top 10 Reasons
7. I’m going to have the conversation as soon as I find a good five hour block of uninterrupted time when my teen will give me his undivided attention and be in a great mood and not have his cell phone in his hand and no one else will be home and the moon will be in the seventh sky. This will probably happen next weekend.
6. My teen isn’t ready to have the conversation and she’s not even curious about the topic. (But I bet the kid of the person sitting next to me is.)
5. I think I may have had the conversation already... at least I think I did.
Slide 14: Top 10 Reasons
4. My daughter hasn’t asked yet.
3. My son doesn’t look cute when he’s rolling his eyes.
2. It just seems so much easier if she learns it all from her best friend’s older brother’s girlfriend’s cousin. Doesn’t it?
And the number one reason why parents don’t talk to their kids about waiting to have sex …
Slide 15: Top 10 Reasons
1. I’m so busy…there are a million other things I’d rather…I mean have to do.
Slide 16: Video Segments 2&3
•when parents talk, kids listen
•what is your parenting style?
Slide 17: Common Barriers
“My child is only 11 and way too young to have a conversation about waiting to have sex.”
Slide 18: Common Barriers
“But they’re just children!”
“Not my kids. I know what they’re thinking.”
“Do I have to talk with them about THAT?”
“I’m concerned how my child will view me.”
“What if I can’t answer their questions?”
Slide 19: Video Segment 4
Talking Tips
Slide 20: What to Say
The two most important things you can communicate to your children:
1. You love them and you will always love them.
2. You do have values and expectations for their behavior.
Slide 21: When to Talk
Elementary School Age
•Talk about love, affection and relationships.
•Talk about treating others with respect and about expecting to be treated with respect.
•When your child is old enough to ask questions, he or she is old enough to receive simple and correct answers.
Slide 22: When to Talk
Middle School Age
•Be very clear.
•Tell your pre-teen or teen why it is important to make good decisions about sex.
•Talk to him or her about setting goals for the future.
•Talk about feelings, relationships, values and waiting to have sex.
Slide 23: When to Talk
High School Age
•Keep talking.
•Continue to talk about setting goals.
•Continue to reinforce your family’s values.
Slide 24: 10 Talking Tips
•Start early at age 10 or 11, before your child starts puberty.
•Use bite-sized pieces of information – build up information over time.
•Use movies, TV shows or songs as a “way into” the conversation.
•Use everyday opportunities and activities as time to talk.
•Share your values and opinions.
•Avoid confrontation – no need to have “the big talk.”
•Ask questions.
•Don’t judge or criticize.
•Invite dialogue.
•Keep it casual and light.
Slide 25: Need help?
•Review take-home materials from today’s workshop.
•Visitwww.4parents.gov for the latest information and resources.
Last revised: July 23, 2009
