African American Outreach Center | Parent Workshop Module

Presented by: [name], African American Outreach Center 

More information: [Phone number], www.4parents.gov

Parents Speak Up National Campaign

• What: National public education campaign sponsored by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services
  
• Objective: Encourage parents to talk to their child early and often about waiting to have sex in order to help ensure their future success and happiness.
  
• Target Audience: Parents of children aged 10-13.
  
• Campaign includes:
  • TV, radio, print, outdoor and internet
  • Community outreach
    
• Web site: www.4parents.gov

 
African American Outreach Center

• Purpose:
  • To share the message of Parents Speak Up with African American families and communities
  • To be a resource
  • To empower families
    
• Future Leaders Outreach Network
  • [Community Name Here] African American Abstinence Partnership led by [Lead Agency Name Here]
    
• What we do
  • JAMZ Summits and Rallies
  • Parent Workshops
  • Community Events
    

Did You Know?

• Delaying sexual activity is linked to a child’s future success in their career, education and overall happiness.
  
• Teen sex can deflate self-esteem, erode optimism and spoil the quality of intimate relationships.
  
• 66% of sexually active teens wish they had waited.
  
• Teens themselves say that abstaining from sexual activity would help them be more successful.
  

Did you Know?

The problem of teen sex affects every community differently.

In the African American community:

• In 2004, the birth rate for African American 15- to 19- year-olds was 63.3 per 1,000 more than one-and-a-half times greater than the national rate.
  
• One-quarter of the roughly 415,000 teen births in 2004 (ages 15 to 19) were to African American teens.
  

Discuss:

• How else has this affected our community?
  
• Other communities?
  

Health Concerns for African Americans

• In 2005, about half (49%) of the people diagnosed with HIV/AIDS were African American.
  
• African-American women are disproportionately affected by chlamydia. In 2005, the rate of reported chlamydia cases per 100,000 black females (1,729.0) was more than seven times that of white females (237.2) and more than twice that of Hispanic females (733.2).
  
• African Americans have the highest rate of gonorrhea of any ethnic group in the nation.
  
• The rate of syphilis is going up again. Between 2004 and 2005, the rate among blacks per 100,000 population increased 11.4 percent (from 8.8 to 9.8), with the largest increases among black men (12.4 percent).
  

Parents Can Make a Difference

• Research shows that parents have the greatest influence on their teens’ sexual decisions – more than their peers or the media.
  
• 9 out of 10 teens say that it would be easier to wait to have sex if they could talk with their parents about it.
  
• Parents who talk to their kids early and often about the importance of waiting are more likely to have children who wait.
  

Parents Speak Up National Campaign

[show the PSAs]

What Influences our Children?

• Discuss:
  • What’s it like raising a child today?
  • What influences do your kids face in the world?
  • What about positive influences
    

Eban: “The Fence”

[image of “Eban”]

The Fence “Eban”

• The West African symbol “Eban” signifies:
  • the separation and security of the African American family from the dangers of the outside world.  
  • the security and safety one finds in the love that is shared in an African American family. 
    
• All families have their own fence
  

The Fence, “Eban”

• The fence is the protection, security, and safety that we provide for our kids.
  
• It keeps in love, appreciation, and respect
  
• The fence ignites curiosity about the outside world
  
• It allows the family to lay a foundation
  

What Happens Inside the Fence?

• Parents create the foundation to help kids make healthy choices once they go into the world.
  
• The parents’ foundation is reinforced by every person in the F.A.M.I.L.Y.
  
• The F.A.M.I.L.Y. reinforces our common values.
  
• Home Training is how we build the foundation.   
  

What Happens Inside the Fence?

• Home Training is NOT… A way to control everything in our kids’ lives.
  
• Home Training is…
  • The preparation for the world away from home.
  • An opportunity to teach our kids values and character before the outside world influences them.
  • It begins and continues in the home with the family.
  • A way to maintain influence once our kids leave home for school or work or when they’re out on their own
  • Talking, listening and modeling. 
    
• One of the important things we can influence is how our children learn about sexuality and sexual behavior.
  

What Happens Outside the Fence?

• Home Training helps children deal with what happens outside the fence. But…
  
• Our community needs to help.
  
• Discuss:
  • What is our community like?
  • What are our shared African American family values?
    

The F.A.M.I.L.Y.

• Some say it “takes a village.” We say it takes a F.A.M.I.L.Y.
  
• Family is much bigger than mom, dad, and kids.   
    
•  F.A.M.I.L.Y. stands for:

                        Fathers

                        All adults and

                        Mothers

                        Individually

                        Leading           

                        Youth

• “All adults” who want to see our kids succeed.
  

Talk With Your Kids

• What do we tell our kids?

        “Talk with your kids early and often. Tell them you want them to wait to have sex. And they’ll have a better chance at success.”

• Key messages:
  • Communication
  • Values
  • Goals
    
• Talking with your kids about waiting to have sex is linked to their success.
  
• How do we say it?
  

It’s Not Easy, But You’re Not Alone

• Many parents have difficulty talking with their kids about sex and waiting.
  
• Some common reasons are:
  • “I don’t know how to get started with these conversations.”
  • “My child isn’t ready yet – he’s still just a baby.”
  • “I know what they’re thinking and it’s just not an issue.”
  • “When they’re ready they’ll come to me.”
  • “If I talk about it they’ll become more curious and want to experiment.”
    

Why Do Parents Find Talking So Hard?

• Many say that their parents didn’t talk to them so they feel uncomfortable and unprepared to talk to their children.
  
• Many feel a sense of loss as they see their child transition into adolescence.
  
• Loss of close bond with their child
  
• Loss of influence over their child’s decisions
  

Activity: “Family Business”

• Objective:
  • Share ideas, concerns and experiences with each other regarding teens and sexuality. 
  • Support and learn from each other. It simply helps to talk with other parents!
    
• Directions:
  • Divide into small groups and discuss the assigned topic.
  • Report back to the large group.
    

Talking Benefits Parent AND Child

• Parents will:
  • Maintain a close relationship with their child and continue to be an important part of their life as they grow into adulthood.
  • Continue to be a primary influence in their child’s decisions as they mature.
    
• Children will:
  • Receive strong values that can help them deal with the sexual pressures they’ll face as a teen.
  • Feel supported in achieving their long-term goals.
    

Having an Effective Conversation

• Start talking early
  • Ideally around age 10 - when your child is beginning the transition into adolescence.
  • Be age appropriate!
    
• Talk often
  • To reinforce your values and maintain an open communication with your child.
  • Share your expectations and values about sex and the importance of waiting.
    

Attitude: Be a W.I.S.E. Parent

• There is a proverb that says, “Only the wise can undo a wise knot.” 
  
• There is also a guide for being a WISE parent when it comes to talking about sexuality and sexual health.
   
• Talk early and often using these strategies.
  

Attitude: Be a W.I.S.E. Parent

• “W” is for welcome
  • Be available.
    
• “I” is for Interest
  • Ask about his or her opinions, friends, school, or movies.
    
• “S” is for Support Good Goals
  • Learn what your teen’s long- and short-term goals are, and support them.
    
• “E” is for Encourage, Educate and Empower
  • Give your teen the guidance, information, and skills to be successful. 
    

Tips: How To Start the Conversation

How a “W.I.S.E.” parent can tell their kids to wait:

• Use movies, TV and everyday occurrences as “ways into” the conversations.
  
• Use “bite-sized” communications – build up information over time.
  
• Have conversations during everyday, enjoyable activities (driving, playing catch, etc.)
  
• Avoid direct confrontation that may cause discomfort.
  
• Ask questions to get your child to talk about their beliefs.
  
• Keep it light and casual.
  

We’re Here to Help

Get help and support at: www.4parents.gov

What you’ll find there:

• Facts
  
• Tips to start the conversation
  
• Downloadable tools
  

Other tools:

• “Parents, Speak Up!” brochure
  
• “Teen Chat”
  

We’re Here to Help

[Local contact information for African American Outreach Center.]

Statistics and More Information

You can find the statistics we have used in this presentation in the following places:

• Maynard, R.A., “The Costs of Adolescent Childbearing,” in R.A. Maynard (ed.), Kids Having Kids: Economic Costs and Social Consequences of Teen Pregnancy (pp. 285-338), Washington, DC: The Urban Institute Press, 1997.
  
• Singh, S., & Darroch, J.E., “Adolescent Pregnancy and Childbearing: Levels and Trends in Developed Countries,” Family Planning Perspectives, 32(1), pp. 14-23.
  
• Resnick, M.D.; Bearman, R.S.; Blum, R.W.; Bauman, K.E.; Harris, K.M.; Jones, J.; Tabor, J.; Beuhring, T.; Sieving, R.E.; Shew, M.; Ireland, M.; Bearinger, L.H.; and Udry, J.R. “Protecting Adolescents From Harm. Findings From the National Longitudinal Study on Adolescent Health.” Journal of the American Medical Association, 1997, 278:823-832.
  
• Albert, Bill. “With One Voice 2007: America’s Adults and Teens Sound Off About Teen Pregnancy.” National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy. February 2007.
  
• The Guttmacher Institute. (2006). U.S.teenage pregnancy statistics National and State trends and Trends by Race and Ethnicity. New York, NY: Guttmacher Institute
  
• Martin, J.A.,Hamilton, B.E., Sutton, P.D., Ventura, S.J., Menacker, F., & Kirmeyer, S. (2006). Births: Final data for 2004. National Vital Statistics Reports, 55(1).
  
• Centers for Disease Control (CDC) particularly: “Trends in Reportable Sexually Transmitted Diseases in the United States, 2005”  viewable online at http://www.cdc.gov.

www.4parents.gov is a useful resource for finding these and other facts and figures.

Last revised: July 14, 2008